I recently saw some one quote this:
“The only thing you should compete for in a marriage is who can be the kindest”.
It’s a lovely sentiment and it initially made me feel very guilty because I don’t think I’m very kind to my husband. I am on his case a fair bit (and bite my tongue a bit too……..so I could be a lot worse) about things around the house.
With the quote in my head yesterday and with both of us at home, I found quite a few occasions where I had a moment to think about whether I should be kind or not and you know what…….I wasn’t. I’ll tell you why.
If being kind means I have to put all the recycling out for the millionth time from the counter where it was discarded by him, I’m not doing it. I will place it in the middle of the floor to make a point. It’s just another job I end up doing that should be shared.
If being kind means I then put away EVERYONE’S clothes that he has taken off the airer and left in a big ole pile on our bed, then I’m not doing it. It’s not just mine. I washed it all and hung it up. It took over a week to be taken down – the job is half done. I’m not doing it.
If being kind means I have to move his ipad to a rather bizarre location because he’s just dumped it on a counter that gets used all the time, then I’m going to do it.
I’m not the cleaner, I’m not the sorter, I’m not the finder, I’m not the housekeeper and I’m not going to accept it.
However — if being kind means I compliment a good job painting the living room, I’m in! If it means making a cup of tea when he’s been stuck in his office for over an hour, I’m in! If it means helping out with the children on a morning he’s in charge to give him an extra 10 minutes sitting down when it’s the third day in a row in charge, I’m in!
I can be kind.
I just won’t be a pushover.